The Maid In The Reverse Harem Game Wants To Quit - Chapter 111
Translator: Nabi
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Chapter 111
It has already been quite a while since the villainous extras, the painter and the spy, were found and dealt with in the episode of 「 A Blood Stained Portrait. 」
Since the day Irenea started to get sick, Ahibalt had been keeping an eye on the spy using what he had heard from her. The bribed painter hadn’t yet committed a crime, so he was graciously spared by only cutting off his hand though the spy was mercilessly killed.
The culprit was the footman, Joseph.
He was essentially dissatisfied with working on the periphery at Lavrenti.
So, this was the trigger for him to follow his brother to Delton later, but this time, it was Veronica who intercepted him. Ahibalt left Joseph to leak information about absinthe and the escape of Otis and Charlotte to Veronica, kept an eye on them, and immediately purged the matter as soon as the matter was over.
And so, it was that the portrait was completed without a single drop of blood, but paradoxically, with a lot of blood.
A portrait with the smile of Ahibalt intact, decorated by Irene according to her liking.
The portrait, which seemed that it could barely be held in an embrace, was painted at the cost of the artist’s life.
‘Would it have looked like this in other lives?’
A symbol of some kind of change, unseen in all the lives and all the stories Irene remembered.
There were certainly many changes she had made in this life, though this was the first time they had taken such tangible strides. Every time the changes in this life and the events that didn’t happen intersected, emotions swirled inside her.
At first, she thought it was remorse or fear of change.
However, as time went on, she found out that it was an emotion that a person should have, an attachment to life.
Life was made up of what you made of it. Just as a gardener plants freesias in a spring garden, the flower garden created by individual selection constitutes what we commonly call life. In front of it, we were all gardeners picking up our first seedling shovel.
So, how could you make only good choices?
Some flowers would die no matter how well you watered them, and you’d have unintentionally grown grass that would take over your flower beds.
Remorse and bliss, joy and sorrow, in the colors of the four seasons.
Things change and get lost in time.
…All of that was a byproduct of the choices and decisions we made.
Irene had forgotten that fact for far too long—what life consisted of, or what people lived by—and that would be the case because it was impossible to know when she was circling the same spot on the clock.
What was the meaning of life, and what was it about it that made you so attached to it?
It dawned on her that no matter what she did, she couldn’t light up a stage that would only circle the same orbit. Once she realized it, the difference was so stark it took her breath away. By the seventh life, she was in tears, happy for the life she had finally gotten.
The people have changed, the relationships have changed.
Tragedy no longer plagued the men of Lavrenti. In their absence, in their negativity, denial and emptiness, there was a place for Irene. These were things that had changed around her.
So, she was no longer an extra.
It was because the word ‘extra’ was used to refer to counting around someone else.
‘…This life is so precious to me.’
She couldn’t let time go around this life. Irene couldn’t bear the thought of people she knew no longer remembered her.
However, what lay ahead of her was a crossroads of choice. In order to stop time from running further, either the manager of fate or the manager of time had to disappear. That way, the system would lose its footing and collapse.
It meant that either Irene or Ahibalt must die.
Ahibalt knew this and didn’t tell her about his meeting with Edith, but unfortunately, she had already found out all of this through Edith’s research records. While Irene’s gaze lingered on the portrait, he remained speechless upon hearing the story.
The long silence was eventually broken.
It was from Ahibalt.
“…So, you knew everything.”
“It was something that couldn’t be hidden forever, you know? Or do you think you’re going to let this life go on like this?”
Saying so, Irene’s gaze traced the trajectory downwards.
Her intention in asking such a question with her oblique gaze down was clearly a provocation to draw out her opponent’s inner thoughts. On the other hand, Ahibalt looked at his impudent opponent, who seemed to have no intention of hiding her intentions, before sighing and running a hand through his hair roughly.
“Irene, if one of us has to disappear, does that mean I should have been willing to accept it?”
“Don’t set me up like that. That’s not what I meant.”
“If that’s not what you mean, why are you saying that to me? I don’t want to lose this life any more than you do.”
Ahibalt’s shadow distorted.
It was because he had a clear face of anguish buried in his hands.
“You’ve been living this life over and over again, so you don’t realize how… unusual this moment is for me.”
As his gaze met hers, emotional eyes were watching Irene in agony.
“It’s always after the whole story is over that I realize everything. Otherwise, you’d be dead.”
How could he express that deep void?
How terrible was it to realize that the only way you could get his feelings back was if the person you loved closed their eyes?
Ahibalt didn’t know how many times he’d wished I didn’t know anything. It was only when the game’s system, or fate as it was often called, let him go that he found himself. Not the emotions and thoughts forced by the system and stories, just his own thoughts.
Every time he reached the ending, Ahibalt would realize why he was so confused about the time that had passed.
…Even though it was Louise Orpen whom he believed he loved, why did it feel wrong even at the moment of confessing his love?
Obviously, he was the one who judged that the kidnapping of the lover he loved couldn’t be helped for the sake of the cause. Though he couldn’t bear to see one maid get hurt in the process…
Even the guilty moments of confusion would become clear, and the realization that he would forget them again would wash over him.
The moment when no love could be confessed, and no truth could be remembered.
Even breathing didn’t seem to be breathing, and the pain of death couldn’t overcome the
In the game, he always lived to the best of his ability, but when the ending was met, the futility, along with all the truth, would hit him like a tidal wave. The sensation of regaining his memory and having all the life he’d worked so hard to build wiped out in an instant never became dull, no matter how many times he went through it.
However, this life was still with him.
Irene, alive and well, was before him. With her straight sunset-colored hair, the violet eyes staring back at him, the rounded cheeks and lightly closed lips, and even the voice with futility, similarly empty tone… everything awakened his senses.
Facing Irene, he felt like he understood the basis of his insatiable possessive desire.
Because of that, he agonized for a long time. In this dilemma, which ends only when one of them dies, Irene, who wishes not to end this life, and the other…
…What exactly should he choose?
“Irene, I could be locked up in this time forever if you let me.”
Ahibalt’s hand grasped hers as he placed her hand over his heart.
“You know I won’t die, and now, you know how to wake me up. So, if time goes by and you need someone to be with you.”
If you need someone to remember all these times and share your frustrations with…
“I’ll be by your side.”
And he would rejoice in the fact that the one person who could do so was himself, the one person who was bound to be the most precious to her in any life.
However, that wasn’t what Irene wished for.
What she wanted was to be in this life, not in the game.
That was how Ahibalt faced tragedy.
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Translator’s Note: Hello, it’s Nabi! I’m the translator of this novel ପ( ๑•ᴗ•๑ )ଓ♡ If you like the novel and would like to support me, please feel free to click the button below to go to my kofi~! Thank you so much for always supporting the novels I work on, even if you don’t buy me a coffee, I really do appreciate it a lot. ❤︎
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