Not Knowing The Betrayal Of That Day - Chapter 101
Translator and Editor: Effe and Yonnee
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Chapter 101
The Marquis waved her hand and walked without looking back. Soon after, she disappeared into the darkness.
The man looked at the Marquis’s back and soon also began to move. In order to do as she had instructed, he would have to move now. That way, the enemy would not be able to respond appropriately to their opponent.
Of course, a lot of blood would be shed in the process, but it couldn’t be helped. He was merely hastening what was already set to be done someday.
The temple had long since lost its former reputation as most of its members were corrupt. If he didn’t cut it out like this, he wouldn’t get anything out of it. The temple would remain only as a product of failed history.
The man looked up at the stone statue in the middle of the room.
‘God, please do not be angry.’
Now was the time to face a new era.
“Really now, I must go before it’s too late.”
He hastened his steps.
Tessa lay on the bed and blinked her eyes. She seemed to have lost consciousness again for a moment. She just looked up at the ceiling, not even thinking about sitting up. She could hear only the sound of the windows rattling in the harsh wind among the deadly silence of the room.
Slowly and carefully, she placed her hand over her stomach. She couldn’t feel anything in her flat belly. But she thought that within this there was her and Hert’s child, and her vision was blurred with tears again.
‘Sorry.’
I’m sorry, baby.
Tessa apologized to the child first. Because she remembered herself clinging onto Kennis, the doctor, crying out for an abortion drug. She struggled through the tears and continued.
‘It’s not that I hate you.’
Trust me, it’s just… I’m not confident.
It’s not because I hate you.
Tessa took a deep breath as she muttered words that were close to excuses. Her emotions kept fluctuating and she couldn’t control herself.
Tessa caressed her stomach, trying to clear her mind. Nothing could be solved if she just continued to cry.
As her tears stopped, Tessa sat up on the bed. She then tried to pull the string to call Mani, but she gave up. She hurriedly got out of bed and took one step closer to the curtained window.
As she pulled back the thick velvet curtains, there was still the clear view of Jutert Castle under the gloomy sky. In addition, there was a small red dot that seemed to be fluttering on the outskirts far away.
‘Hert.’
Tessa recalled Hert, who was out on the outer wall, with a nostalgic voice. He, the most precious being to her, was not here now.
Tessa knew full well that Hert was fighting outside to defend the castle. He said he would be back soon, but she didn’t know what would happen either.
‘What am I supposed to do now…?’
As always, Tessa’s not being of any help to Hert today made her heart ache even more. If only she had been a bit better… If it wasn’t like this, if she was the way she used to be… She may have been of some help to him.
At least, if she had been an educated lady like the Marchioness or Janet, she might have been able to protect this castle with confidence.
Tessa still couldn’t understand why Hert wanted to marry her. There was nothing about her that’s good. The person who would become Hert’s wife should be a competent and brilliant lady who could help him faithfully, not a stupid woman who couldn’t do anything.
Because that’s what any man would have wanted.
And the child he would have with such a noble lady was the only one qualified to succeed Hert. Not a child born from her pitiful womb…
‘No, baby. It’s not that you’re lacking…’
It’s…
It’s because I’m lacking…
Thick tears began to trickle down Tessa’s cheeks. Even though she knew that nothing could be solved by crying, she couldn’t hold back the tears.
In fact, everything to her was unfair and something to be resented. Tessa never wanted any of this. This sense of shame and guilt was now overwhelming and stifling. All she ever wanted was something simple.
To become independent from the orphanage, form a family with Hert, and live a normal life like everyone else.
But why did it become like this?
‘Why should I be a burden to Hert? Why do I think my child with Her is unnecessary… I have to think…’
No.
She really hates this.
Tessa hated her misfortune. She hates it. She hates the misfortune that kept trying to devour her. Why me? What did I do wrong? Is it so wrong to want to live happily with my precious person? Why me… only being so mean… to me. It’s about time you let me go…
Tessa reached out and yanked the window open. The wild cold wind roared and poured into her room. Standing in front of the window, Tessa looked down. Beneath her, misery was smiling with its mouth wide open.
Let you go? Don’t be ridiculous.
The gaping mouth slid as if to swallow Tessa at any moment.
Tessa stared down, not realizing that all her tears were dripping down there. Will she be comfortable if she throws her body here like this? Can this pain, guilt, and unhappiness end?
The impulse to succumb to death, which she had forgotten for a while, arose. It seemed like she could die really easily now. It would hurt terribly, but it would only be for a moment, so she was okay with that.
She’s been writhing in pain for half her life, but this will only be a fleeting pain.
It was when the olive-colored eyes were about to sink into black. Someone entered the room. Footsteps and something else hitting the floor. Tessa looked back in surprise and saw the Marchioness standing with a cane.
“Do you think it will be comfortable if you fall from there?”
“Ma… dam.”
“It would all be over if you just died, do you think that?”
The Marchioness continued her words poignantly. Her face seemed to know what Tessa was thinking just now. Tessa had no choice but to face the Marchioness turning her back against the window.
“That’s right, when you die, everything will end. But I want you to know that the end won’t be entirely comfortable.”
“I… I am…”
“Don’t die. Not yet, Tessa.”
“What is that…”
The Marchioness came towards Tessa, strengthening the grip of her hand on the cane. Although she was being assisted by a cane, her gait was controlled and powerful. She could even forget that the cane existed.
“I was once like that too. I felt like everything would end if I die.”
“…….”
“I’m sure you know, Tessa, but I broke both of my legs in an accident. The carriage I was riding had gotten overturned, crushing my legs and completely wrecking them. I can walk a little bit like this now, but… At first, I lay in bed and couldn’t move.”
The Marchioness’s hand abruptly reached for Tessa’s back. Tessa’s startled eyes closed, and Elena closed the window, latching it shut. Only then did the cold wind that was blowing in the room stopped.
“It was my husband who made me that way.”
“Tha, that…”
“Isn’t it surprising? Even more shocking is that my husband tried to kill me so blatantly. I was rather lucky that only my legs were affected. If it went according to his plan, I should have died right then and there.”
Elena’s voice sank for a moment. Eventually, she smiled softly as if it was no big deal and walked over to a chair and sat down.
“You wonder why my husband tried to kill me? That’s obvious. It was all because of power and money, Tessa.”
“…….”
“My husband and I had an arranged marriage, and I came from a powerful family, so I was a woman who my husband found difficult to hold by the neck. At that time, my husband was not even the heir to the Jutert family. He attained the Marquis’ position only because I made it possible.”
The Marchioness’ voice was light and she smiled with gestures, like a person telling a fairy tale that starts with ‘once upon a time’… But Tessa had a vague idea that it must have taken the Marchioness a while before she could smile while speaking about the experiences she was telling her now.
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Sorry mam but you did not get beaten up, SA-ed or rap*d by anyone.