I'm A Villainess, Can I Die? - Chapter 109
Translator and Editor: Effe and Tea
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Chapter 109
“Selena?”
No, why do you keep calling people’s names?
“Yes. Sir Lucas.”
“Do you know where you’re lying right now?”
“I’m lying on the balcony.”
“Ha.”
I slowly opened my eyes at the small sigh. Lucas was looking down at me and shaking his head.
What are you shaking your head at? When people are tired, they can lie on the balcony.
I looked at him and slowly raised my body. My position was not comfortable as I had laid crumpled up.
If the other person wants me to sit down, I’ll sit down.
When I sat up and stared at Lucas, he gave a small grunt and smiled.
Then he came over and sat down beside me.
“Don’t keep sitting on the floor, Selena. Especially in front of others.”
Lucas quietly rebuked me. As if he was worried about me, but he kept smiling in the end.
“How did you know this place?”
“I saw you earlier. Staggering to the balcony alone. I came here because I was worried……. I never thought I would face a sight like this.”
I looked at him and let out a breath.
My hazy mind and hot drunkenness were slowly disappearing.
“Sir Lucas.”
Lucas smiled at my call and turned his head toward me. I tilted my head.
Looking at the symbol of time, the crescent moon, I slowly spoke.
“How do people laugh? And how does Sir laugh? In two days. In two days, you’re leaving for a dangerous battlefield……. Aren’t you afraid of war? … How can you laugh?”
Lucas was silent for a moment. Turning my head to face him, his purple eyes were shining quietly.
“…… Is Selena afraid?”
The answer after the silence was another question. A question for me. Like Lucas, I didn’t take the time to consider and replied right away.
“Yes. I’m afraid. I’m afraid you’ll get hurt. I’m afraid you won’t come back. I am afraid of everything.”
And the cause of all that will be me. That is also the most frightening.
Haha, so selfish.
Lucas kept his mouth shut.
Then, as I had, he tilted his head and looked up at the sky.
What is he looking at? Is it the crescent moon, a star, or the dark sky?
“I am afraid, too. Probably everyone is afraid. However, I am laughing like that because I shouldn’t be afraid.”
He was afraid, but he laughed because he shouldn’t be afraid.
“…… Does Sir laugh because of that?”
Lucas’ mouth corners rose slightly. The shape of his lips drawn with an arc line was exactly like a crescent moon.
“Yes. I’ve been laughing for a very long time. To not be afraid. My father lost one of his arms in a subjugation. Mother died while my father was gone.”
I stared blankly at him. His lips, rising like a crescent moon, did not come down even while he spoke about heavy things.
It reminded me of his appearance in the original story.
The way he expressed his feelings only in front of the female lead. Outside, he always had a relaxed smile.
Most of his smiles were only acting.
Didn’t I tell him that, too?
Don’t act.
If his acting and his smile so far have come from fear…… When did his fears begin?
The day his father lost his arm?
The day his mother died?
I tilted my head. The dark night sky, a slender crescent moon.
“Don’t get hurt. Sir Lucas. Because I don’t have the confidence to smile like that.”
“Will you smile even if I get hurt?”
“…… Of course. Even if you get hurt, I will smile.”
Learning of his secret circumstances that were not shown in the original story.
Such a selfish and strange time was passing that made me feel so at peace.
In the quiet silence, someone knocked on the wall again. We sat down and looked at each other.
Wouldn’t it be too funny if people saw us like this?
The Lady and the vice-commander.
Lucas got up, took his position, and reached out to me. And in the moment I tried to hold his hand.
“Miss.”
The voice was familiar. I looked at his hand and shook my head. Because I didn’t feel the need to get up.
Lucas lightly lifted his outstretched hand, smiled, and leaned back against the balcony railing.
“Come in.”
I spoke and a moment later, the curtains covering the balcony opened.
It was, of course, Aiden.
Holding a glass of water in one hand, he had a dumbfounded face for a moment. Perhaps he hadn’t imagined that Lucas would be there.
“Curtain.”
Only then did Aiden close the curtains and step inside.
“Have you been here?”
“Yes, well. Somehow.”
No, they’re the ones who came to see me, so why are they talking to each other?
I sat down and looked at the two of them blankly, then shrugged lightly.
If they’re going to talk, at least it’s good that they get along?
“Miss, I brought you some water. Please drink it.”
Aiden looked at Lucas and slowly sat down in front of me.
From the dew on the glass he had handed me, he seemed to have brought cool water from somewhere.
“What a cutie.”
Thanks, Aiden.
I took the glass and quenched my thirst. However, the balcony was strangely quiet.
At this point, Lucas, who said not a word, and Aiden, who handed me a glass, were both very quiet.
Aiden looked at me blankly and then quickly got up. I even caught a glimpse of his reddened ears.
What, what’s wrong with him?
I tilted my head at his inexplicable appearance and drank all the remaining water. My thirst was washed away by the cool water.
As I finished emptying my glass, there was a small laugh from above me.
It was Lucas.
Lucas put his hand over his mouth and his shoulders were trembling. He was like someone who’d witnessed anything funny.
Everyone seemed to be drunk.
Lucas had held back the laughter alone then took a deep breath and looked at me.
The smile on his lips resembled that of a villain.
“Selena, you promised me the other day.”
“A promise?”
“Yes. Well…… You know. That word.”
Lucas curved his eyes prettily and pointed the tip of his chin at Aiden.
Promise…… ? That word? Aiden……Oh, that.
That strange promise to tell Aiden that I was worried about Lucas.
I forgot. The promise was so bizarre. I nodded slowly.
“Yes, there is. A promise. Why?”
“If you haven’t done that yet, do it today. Selena.”
Today? Now? I turned to Aiden who was looking at the two of us with a puzzled expression.
Yes, it doesn’t matter when I say it…… It would be better to do it in front of the party.
“Aiden.”
“Yes?”
Aiden answered with his eyes wide open when his name was suddenly called.
His face was still a bit red.
Tsk. That’s why, drink responsibly.
“I am very worried about Sir Lucas.”
At the end of my announcement, Aiden’s lips parted. It was as if he was asking me why I was telling him that.
It looked so silly that I was about to laugh. No, it looked like I was smiling a little bit.
Aiden raised his lips as if sighing at my smile, then turned his gaze to Lucas, the subject of worry, the person in the story.
I followed Aiden’s gaze with my eyes. Lucas tilted his head with a relaxed smile.
‘What.’
The expression on his face seemed to say.
“You are much more childish than I thought.”
Wow, are you two going to fight now?
No, more than that, I’m worried about him, so why is he childish?
As I was busy thinking in my head, Lucas’ hand, standing next to me, touched my hair.
With my long hair twirling around his fingers like a toy, he answered without erasing the smile on his face.
“That’s okay. Because those who are jealous of childish behavior are only childish people. You have nothing to be jealous of.”
What does all this mean? Did the two of them make any bets? I just gave up thinking.
I had no intention of adding more useless things to my already complicated head.
I chose to just tilt my head and look up at the sky. And by cursing at the crescent moon again.
“I’m leaving. I’m the vice-commander of the subjugation, so I can’t be away for long. Get some fresh air and go to your room early to sleep. Selena.”
“…… yes. Sir Lucas, don’t drink too much. Now…… you look like you’re drunk.”
Lucas laughed again and left the balcony.
His steps paused for a moment as he passed Aiden, then continued outside.
Watching the curtains close, I gestured toward Aiden.
“Aiden. Come and sit down.”
“Can I get you another glass of water?”
“No. It’s okay. Just come and sit down.”
Aiden sat next to me without saying anything. I looked at his handsome profile and leaned my head on Aiden’s shoulder.
Maybe it was because there were so many thoughts in my head, my head was heavy.
Oh, it’s nice to lean on it like this.
“Aiden.”
“Yes. Miss.”
“…… tell me it’s okay.”
Aiden was speechless. I closed my eyes.
When I closed my eyes, it felt like my other senses opened up. From the chill of the cold air to Aiden’s warmth.
The sound of his breathing and his heart beating.
The sound of a lively banquet hall and the sound of leaves rustling in the wind.
“If you say it’s okay, then everything is really okay. So, say it’s okay.”
Aiden’s shoulders trembled. Just like someone trying to move his arm.
I opened my eyes. I saw my reflection in his green eyes. I could see the hand on his other side that was awkwardly raised.
I closed my eyes again.
Aiden’s hand touched my head. Then he slowly stroked my hair.
A clumsy hand. Too clumsy to be cautious.
“It’s okay, Miss. Everything will be okay.”
________
Pitter, patter.
The raindrops had weakened.
The rain, which had been pouring all night as if there was a hole in the sky, had gradually subsided since dawn, and now there were only a few drops left as the sun began to rise.
It was fortunate. If it rains on the day of the departure, how uncomfortable and difficult it will be. There may be disruptions to the schedule.
Safety first. Safety is number one priority.
Of course, even now the ground will still be muddy.
I put my hands together and closed my eyes.
Please, let them get to the outskirts without incident.
Oh, I shouldn’t have prayed? If there is a God, it is clear that God is not on my side.
Knock, knock.
Someone knocked on the door. I released my clasped hands and answered quietly.
“Come in.”
Jane appeared through the carefully opened door. She was always bright and smiling, but today her face was dark.
The emotion reflected on her cloudy face was worry. Worry about me. She’s a good child.
“Miss, you should go out now.”
I nodded and got up. Dressed in a bright yellow dress that didn’t match the day of the subjugation, I headed outside.
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